Friday, May 12, 2006

shorts on the highway.

Tom Cruise
Yeah, we called the crazy police a while ago but it seems a tad too late to "Free Katie" now; she's spawned him a child. All we can do is back away slowly and never look back. I mean, the man is a Scientologist for fucks sake. ALIENS folks, we're not even talking humans here! The couch jumping was only really the icing on the cake in the realm of crazy.

The thing is, we can't back away. He's always *there*, lurking on every talk show, agreeing to interviews in every trashy magazine and attacking mothers and other normal people with his cheesy grinning rhetoric! It's become to big to hide from.

I guess, since that and the whole kidnapping Katie and turning his house into a delivery room thing I haven't really been able take him seriously though. Okay, I lie - I never took Tom Cruise seriously. But there was a time when it was like hey, it's a Tom Cruise film, I wonder if I'll go see that. NOW it's more like ooh, crazy has a new movie. Should I go make fun of it?

So, I enjoyed MI-3 to a certain extent but I really had to suspend reality to do it. Tom Cruise does not play characters in movies, he plays Tom Cruise - that's it. There are few movies he has done where he plays something other than himself. This is what makes someone a blockbuster, mega hollywood star as opposed to an 'actor'. He's a big gun - it's his job to be Tom Cruise. No one hires him because he's a stellar actor that can really pull off a role with dignity and superb craft. He's hired because he brings in the bucks - because he's TOM!

Anyway: MI-3. The whole ending was so ridiculous that I just started laughing. Actually, come to think of it - there were a few other people around me laughing as well.

Embrace the crazy, I say. Dare I suggest it, but has TC taken over from Michael Jackson as our resident 'crazy fucker that we can laugh at'?

Who makes your 'crazy' alarm go off more. Tom or Michael?