Saturday, June 10, 2006

psychic heart

You know you're getting on when your night ends early and you think "ohhh good" while slipping into your jammies and snuggling under your doona so you can watch bad TV. I'm pretty easily pleased most days. I'm very pathetic most days too.

I had lunch with my boss today. Or rather, I had lunch with a small group of work colleagues, one of which was my boss. Although I get along okay with her these days, as a general rule I am pretty well intimidated by my managers (always have, always will be probably). I get nervous when I have to consult with someone who effectively pays my wage and who I have to knock on a door and/or make an appointment to speak to. It's a power dichotomy/control issue. By witholding time and money you effectively gain power. There's also this other thing where I was brought up to believe that if someone was my boss, my teacher, a parent of a friend - whatever - they were to be regarded as superior to me and treated with respect. If I was ever caught giving sass to anyone in that list I was really ripped through. I remember once a report card came home that said I was 'chatty' in class or something to that effect (ie: no biggie) and when my parents saw that I was sat down read the riot act. Maybe I've really taken that general idea of 'superiority' on in my adult life though. Sure, I don't actually *believe* that these managers of mine are better than me, but I'm still very much that little girl that needs to please and be found pleasing.

We went out to celebrate the marriage of one of the girls from work. It was interesting: 4 divorced women, me and the bride. All of the women at work who have teenage/adult children are divorced actually. It's a bit scary. It was a wonderful lunch though. It wasn't awkward with the boss at all. I have been in many social situations with my boss but this was probably the most relaxed and candid. It was good to see a different side to her.

After that I met up with FashionCousin. We went and saw The da Vinci Code. It was a tad long for my liking. The subject matter should have been good enough to sustain the length of the movie but something went wrong and that last hour really dragged when it shouldn't have. Ritchie Cunningham fucked up somewhere along the line me thinks. But the movie did bring up an interesting question:

If faced with the situation of having to procreate to save the world who would I rather do it with - The blonde albino monk guy or the blonde evil guy from The Karate Kid movies? Either way you're getting an arsehole. I mean, at first glance I'd probably go the blonde evil karate guy but geez..he was mean and annoying - whereas albino monk wasn't annoying, just a psychopath.

Tough one.

On the way out from the cinema FashionCousin and I were walking to our car when this group of guys started following us and whispering to eachother and pointing at us etc. We practically had to run to the car (we were skipping along by this stage) and lock all the doors (they turned around and walked off when they saw this). You know what? Feeling unsafe and scared when you're walking 2 minutes from the cinema to your car really sucks. I shouldn't need a chaperone but somehow I feel like I *do* need one. I'm angry that there are groups of men out there who have malice intent towards women. I wonder if guys ever think about what it's like to be a woman walking to their car alone and scared for their lives? I don't know maybe they do? Boys, do you feel scared at walking to your car at night? Is it even an issue? I think it's really nice if guys walk girls to their cars, btw.

FashionCousin had some interesting news in that she went to see a psychic during the week who was apparently *right on the money*. This woman is blind but was able to touch photos and tell FC exactly what was happening in them. There was a lot of freaky stuff that came out. Somehow I have got FC to check on the situation and get me an appointment too (this woman doesn't advertise she's sort of a 'need to know' basis type psychic).

So, what should I ask?