[Miscellany]
Monday, May 21, 2007
Watching forever
Over coffee with some of the girls tonight #2 brought up her friend Em and the conundrum that ensued after being cracked onto by a lesbian at a bar the other night. #2 commented that Em didn't know what to say or how to react to the forthright way this girl was putting the moves on. Apparently it was very much like how men get when they are being too full on (girls, you know what I'm talking about).
Obviously, since Em has no interest in girls sexually the response is an easy no thanks, however Em found it hard to articulate that in a matter of fact way to this woman. It's interesting because for any girl who's ever been cracked onto by a strange man in a bar (that they're not interested in), saying no isn't exactly hard. Obviously, if you know the guy then saying no is very difficult, no one actually ever wants to hurt someone's feelings. But when it comes to strangers that are annoying you by being too full on then saying no is just something that needs to be done. Not every girl wants to lead a man on for a drink, you know. Why then was it so hard for Em to make it absolutely clear that she felt uncomfortable by this woman?
Sure, I'm not saying that a woman who doesn't want to will ever engage in something with a lesbian when she doesn't actually want to - but just that you're nicer about saying no to a lesbian than you would be when it comes to a man you don't want. Therefore I have to ask:
Is it politically incorrect for a woman to reject a lesbian in the same way that she would reject a man?
Does the same conundrum exist for straight men when being cracked onto by a gay man?
As for MM - this is an oldie but I've had it on repeat almost everywhere, in my head, in the car, in the art room ...and loud too. Is it Joy Division? Is it New Order? Am I splitting hairs by even thinking about it? Sometimes you come across a song that takes you somewhere completely different to where you are, and I guess this song has been it for me. Somewhere in between dreamy and vibrant. Somewhere I can't quite articulate except in that part of me that makes sense only to me (as usual). I'll let you decide where it sits for you on the musical spectrum...
Ceremony - New Order
Obviously, since Em has no interest in girls sexually the response is an easy no thanks, however Em found it hard to articulate that in a matter of fact way to this woman. It's interesting because for any girl who's ever been cracked onto by a strange man in a bar (that they're not interested in), saying no isn't exactly hard. Obviously, if you know the guy then saying no is very difficult, no one actually ever wants to hurt someone's feelings. But when it comes to strangers that are annoying you by being too full on then saying no is just something that needs to be done. Not every girl wants to lead a man on for a drink, you know. Why then was it so hard for Em to make it absolutely clear that she felt uncomfortable by this woman?
Sure, I'm not saying that a woman who doesn't want to will ever engage in something with a lesbian when she doesn't actually want to - but just that you're nicer about saying no to a lesbian than you would be when it comes to a man you don't want. Therefore I have to ask:
Is it politically incorrect for a woman to reject a lesbian in the same way that she would reject a man?
Does the same conundrum exist for straight men when being cracked onto by a gay man?
As for MM - this is an oldie but I've had it on repeat almost everywhere, in my head, in the car, in the art room ...and loud too. Is it Joy Division? Is it New Order? Am I splitting hairs by even thinking about it? Sometimes you come across a song that takes you somewhere completely different to where you are, and I guess this song has been it for me. Somewhere in between dreamy and vibrant. Somewhere I can't quite articulate except in that part of me that makes sense only to me (as usual). I'll let you decide where it sits for you on the musical spectrum...
Ceremony - New Order
Labels: blurry girl, lesbian, musical monday
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