Saturday, November 24, 2007

politics and sexual politics

Today I went to do my civic duty by voting I witnessed something so horrific that 4 hours later I'm still not sure I'm over it. There was NO sausage sizzle at the polling booth. Cake stall; yes. Sausage Sizzle; NO. How can they call themselves a polling booth if they don't offer a lovely burnt to perfection with a choice of tomato sauce with or without onions sausage sizzle? I don't understand how they sleep at night. I'm just disappointed and upset by the whole thing and feel it is all very unAustralian. Even if I personally am not partaking in the sausage fest then I like to know that others in my electorate have the option to chow down if they want. Cake stall: Who wants a flipping cake stall? There's no enjoyment in a fruitcake...not like a nice hot sausage between a slice of tip top bread dripping with sauce and creating a sense of community spirit when you all stand around and laugh at the cronies handing out the vote Liberal pamphlets.

I know that the school I work at is having a sausage sizzle because I had to paint the bloody sign informing the general public of the event, so it confuses me that my local isn't having one. Who are these barbarians?

So, yes - it's election day. We have a choice between an ear wax eater and a man who has never invited his own deputy over for tea in the last 10+ years of working together. Fuck all other policies - I mean the fact Howard is war mongering, semi-retired, cricket loving, upper middle class serving man who enjoys being sodomized by the US Prez has a lot to do with it too - but the dinner thing well, I think that's just disgraceful. Mrs Howard has come out and said that she and the hon. Johnny haven't invited Pete and wife over for tea because they don't ever have foursomes at their home for dinner parties. Yes, this was the official bullshit excuse. It's not like they have to be best friends or anything but I assumed that there would be some bond to speak of since they are running the country together. After all, if the Libs stay in power the reigns will be handed over to Pete in a minute. Good to know there's a lot of communication going on between them behind closed doors so a smooth transition happens. No thanks, I voted for ear wax guy instead. At least we know his ears are clean enough to listen...well, they are NOW.

EDIT - convo I had with my bro earlier.

bro - so hey, I think this girl thought I was stalking her.
me - um...whaaa?
bro - yeah, it was the other day when I was meeting you for dinner and I got off the bus at a different spot from where I usually do so I could walk to the restaurant.
me - okay...
bro - anyway, I think this girl thought I was following her.
me - *laughing* riiight, did she stare at you or something?
bro - yeah, she was looking over her shoulder at me while I was walking behind her. She was really freaked out.
me - no shit *laughing*.
bro - it's not funny! I don't want to be a stalker
me - *laughing even harder* whatever. So what happened?
bro - she ran.
me - RAN? Like....ran?
bro - yeah, the thing is I tried to walk slower so that it wouldn't freak her out and then I thought I'd cross the road so I was away from her but at the last second she crossed too - so it looked like I was following her across the road. She saw me do it and then she ran.
me - oh my god, that's tragic. You stalking bastard, you have fucked her shit up good.
bro - why does she have to be so paranoid?
me - are you fucking kidding me? You have no idea what it's like to be a girl walking down a deserted street alone? If I hear heavy footsteps behind me I always grab my keys and hold them between my fingers, ready to punch. I always walk faster. I can't believe you don't know this!
bro - yeah, but that's just you.
me - bullshit, you fuck.
bro - but I'm not a stalker! I'm not doing anything wrong.
me - duh, you're just there, that's enough. She doesn't know you. She doesn't care who you are. You're just some guy walking down a totally deserted street behind her. It's not like it was in the middle of Collins St or something. You're asking her to trust you to walk behind her when in the real world women walking alone down a deserted street might be rape victims. Especially around THAT area. Why would she trust YOU?
bro - I didn't ask her to trust me! I just don't want her to freak out.
me - yeah, well maybe in a society where men don't prey on women she could walk down the street without freaking out.
bro - yeah, I know that this is an issue but...
me - sure, you *know* it's an issue but it's not something you actually ever have to deal with. It's not part of your reality of walking alone. It's part of her reality. Okay, you will rarely see a woman actually RUN but they're probably thinking 'hm..this could be dodgy, or 'oh shit' somewhere in their heads. Just because women don't always show their fear doesn't mean they aren't scared. She might have had an experience with an attacker or maybe her friend did.
bro - yeah well, I'm just saying I'm not a stalker.
me - well stop stalking people then.
bro - you suck.
me - yeah, bring it up at the next meeting of the men's alliance when you're talking about ruling the world hahahaha.
bro - haha, you're an idiot. But seriously, now I have a problem
me - what's that?
bro - I take her bus everyday. So every day from now on I have to deal with her thinking that I'm stalking her.
me - hahaha, that rules. Are you going to be like "hey I noticed you thought I was stalking you the other day but I just wanted you to know that I'm really normal".
bro - haha, noooo
me - go on, it would be cool. See if she reports you.
bro - I can't believe I have to deal with this shit now. I did nothing wrong.
me - yeah yeah whatever, no sympathy for stalkers.

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