[Miscellany]

I used to have dreams where my father would come back from the dead. In the dreams there was always the threat that if I brought up the death to him he would disappear again. I guess there was always a feeling of impending doom on the horizon - which is how I felt before he died anyway to tell you the truth. But apart from that there was a sense of elation in the dream - like we had cheated the system somehow. These dreams always felt so real and now that I don't have them anymore (or haven't had one in a good year anyway), I miss them. I always thought of then as my dad coming back and saying hello. Sometimes you get desperate and anything will do, you know? There is one thing I've discovered though, you can't cheat the system.

I was pretty astounded when I realised that the movie Volver, explored similar themes to my own dreams. I didn't know what the movie was about before I went to see it - the preview was unclear - but E, L and I decided to give it a go anyway. It was a great film, not just for Penelope's rather magnificent rack but just because it was interesting to see an almost all female ensemble of varying ages in a film that was as quirky as it was touching. Afterwards, E, L and I had our post-movie discussion that happened to center around E's group of male work mates.

You'd be hard pressed to find a bigger group of mean spirited blokes who do nothing more than perve on women and laugh about how badly they treat them. The stuff that I've heard these guys say about women I would have a really hard time repeating to anyone without blushing and I'm not even prudish when it comes to that kind of stuff! But yeah, following jailbait around, cheating on their girlfriends, commenting that size 10 women are too fat (I thought this was a joke because you always hear that crap that men are easier on women's bodies than women themselves are ..but obviously not! geez) and so much more.

Well, I thought that kind of stuff was just exhibited by a minority ...yes that's what I thought until I was dutifully informed that most men are actually like that and as E and L were both confirming this I thought about other things I had heard.. But surely this can't be true. I don't really have a lot of male friends (maybe it's the fact that I do tend to have an opinion about things), and I do know that while I've never been accused of thinking that men are princes (hahhahahahhah - probably the opposite actually) I have always expected that there are quite a few out there in the scary world of sexist pigs who can be kind, loving and are faithful. I have also been informed (by men!) that expecting those things is expecting too much. Excuse my ignorance here but aren't those basic traits that we'd expect of all humans? - So if that is "expecting too much" from men then doesn't that say something not too nice about that male species?

So, E if the majority men are like this then why are we WITH them?
E thought about it for a moment.
'We want babies, not just babies - we want families* - and we'll settle just to get it.

*obviously not all women actually want those things - but still, the dickhead factor is still running rampant there too!

Do women settle more than men?

Labels: dickheads, dreams, questions, wonderings

posted by M at 10:55 am 32 comments

Oh noes, Ian Thorpe called a press conference yesterday to come out of the closet (finally) but instead announced his retirement! What-What? How did that happen? I had my glitter face gel and copy of Alicia Bridges' I like the Night Life all ready to go in the CD player, I was that excited but what happened instead? No dice! I should have known, after all he is ancient at 24 and wears too much hair gel to ever really cut through the water like he once did - also there was that little problem with eating fast food and partying hard with the who'swho in Hollywood. Anyway, at least he came up with a good reason for throwing in the chlorinated towel - citing boredom at staring at black line all day among other things. Luckily none of us ever get bored at work and feel like throwing the towel in by 24. Err! Actually, it's very Australian, now that I think of it.

As demonstrated in other posts of mine you will realise just how devastated I am by the news. What shall we do without him? Can the Australian swimming team go on? Will shares in hamburgers suddenly rise when Ian takes up on a steady diet of them? Is he going to being the face of pearl necklaces (hahaha) in that sponsorship gimmick? Will he continue being Australia's premiere fashion doyen? Oh lord, so many things to worry about! At least the rest of the world now has a chance to win a couple of gold medals in the pool every now and again.

Speaking of wusses the Victorian election race is hotting up for the big boom this weekend. Everyone is complaining about how much they hate the bullshit that goes on during the political race and dislike the childlike name calling and shin kicking that goes on, but I disagree. I LOVE it. I wish every month was political election month. There's so much to see and do. There's the political mudslinging: Ted Ballieu helped secure the sale of Victorian schools during the 90s and then profited from their sale? Now if that isn't evil, I don't know what is! Personal mudslinging: Ted Baillieu's mother in law discovered with a huge billboard for the Labour party (her son in law Ted Baillieu is the Liberal president) in her front yard. Hilarious! Gimmicks involving wearing too tight speedos while trying to prove what a trooper you are. Not a good look Mr Baillieu, ever! Come to think of it Mr Bracks, you are guilty of this too. Gimmicks involving other people wearing bathers as they confront you about your crappy environmental politics. Oh yes Mr Bracks, did you have any answer for her at all? Ahh, there is so much to laugh about during this time. It's hard to know what to read first in the paper actually

It's no big secret that politically speaking I'm a dirty tree-hugging hippy. I am not that impressed by political candidates who have a fuck load of money, a la Ted Baillieu. I don't think those kinds of people can ever identify with the common people who struggle with day to day living. Yes, that would be MOST of us. Plus he has his fingers in too many business shares for my liking. What's going to happen when a political decision conflicts with a business one - oh right, the War in Iraq happens. Unacceptable! That's not to say that I have completely demonised him or anything - some of the things he says make perfect sense (gay unions okay. yay! Ian Thorpe will be rapt!). But something is NQR about him. The problem is, there is also something NQR about Steve Bracks (the Labour party president) too. Sigh.

Labels: dickheads

posted by M at 6:16 am 24 comments

When I heard about the Rape DVD I was horrified. When I read about what actually happened I cried my eyes out. There is never an excuse - underage or not. I don't actually share the 'lock 'em up and throw away the key' attiude that some people have for these kinds of offences. Everyone knows hardcore rapists are back out on the street within a year on good behaviour anyway. My punishment would be much, much harsher. The kind of retribution I would applaud when it comes to dealing with these kinds of men, goes waaay outside the dealings of the "law" (which let's face it is a JOKE). I do not think that the law is in any way adequate in dealing with crimes of sexual assault. I don't even think we're half way to treating victims like 'humans' when it comes to rape trials. I know you have to hear both sides of the story but if you think you can't defend the indefensible then when it comes to rape trials you're wrong. Truth of the matter though, I doubt there is any punishment that would ever fit the crime.

That is speaking generally - but basically what happened in this particular situation was this: After agreeing to meet someone off MSN a young girl with 'mild developmental delay' was set upon by a gang of boys who sexually assulted her, urinated on her, set her on fire, filmed it all and distributed the DVD. It was also shown on YouTube complete with lines like "What the f---, she's the ugliest thing I have ever seen."

I know some girls are absolute bitches. I know that there are girls who will kill, lie, cheat, steal, and abuse men. But this kind of shit described above sounds all too common to me on the part of actions from men on women. Tell me you haven't heard of another case like this one before? It's a dime a dozen and it's crap. Rape is a gendered crime - apart from the excpetions to the rule rape is a crime that happens to women perpetrated by men. I honestly don't want to hear about the arguments where women 'make shit up'. This is not what I'm talking about. I mean the real deal. How did we get to the stage where men think it's okay to do this? They thought it would be a good time to target a girl and sexually assault her. I can't imagine anyone not be horrified by this, but still it happened. It happens everyday. It's happening right now, somewhere. Why?

This makes me both sad and angry. We basically live in a culture that supports this kind of action. I'm not saying anyone condones it - I'm saying that the culture is RIPE for it. A DVD was made and it was distributed. I mean fuck.

Are we raising boys wrong?
How did it get to this stage?
Why?

Someone explain it to me because:
I
don't
understand.

Labels: dickheads, men, rant, rape, women

posted by M at 11:39 pm 24 comments