[Miscellany]

My boss called me into her office the other day wanting to change the way we assess in the curriculum area that I am a leader of.  Of course, I'm being nice...  she didn't want to change the way we assess, she had already made that decision without consulting me.  Rather, she wanted to tell me that in fact we weren't going to use the assessment tool that I had painstakingly put together (and had been using at the school until now..) and instead we were now to use an online annotated assessment sample instead.

Labels: boss, questions, school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, teaching the teacher

posted by M at 1:06 am 7 comments

The shift in Education Leadership lately has been towards a business model of management.  I've never worked in an office but I've seen The Office and as far as I can comprehend the business model basically consists of a complete tosser at the top who has no idea what they are doing/might be good at managing one thing, middle management who don't care and the plebs who do all the important stuff while stealing the highlighters when no one is looking.  It's a money driven system with an agenda of maintaining or expanding a commodity.

In teaching, it is ridiculous to think of learning and students as a commodity.  A commodity implies that there is a direct return on an investment, which is all well and good in theory except that the business world is notoriously impatient and only wants results in one form (economics).  Getting an economic return on the student investment will probably not be evident for 30-50 years if something was put in place today.  This is too long for a political party to wait in order to brag about their effectiveness in government.  Despite allegations to the contrary I honestly do no believe any of the major political parties want to promote anything that won't show a result within their term of governing.  Is this cynical of me?  It's only true.  Furthermore isn't the return we actually want to see is a healthy, happy community of people who are life long learners and critical thinkers?  Isn't THAT the point?  Oh wait, that's not the same as money.. okay.

When compared to the business model the current school model of leadership has some similarities particularly in that there is also a complete tosser at the top, middle management who don't care and plebs.  However while an office pleb has only a small level of authority, a school "pleb" gets to be King of the Castle in their own classroom.  They are the authority in a very real way.  This means that in order to have effective leadership of staff from the top, you absolutely need to make sure that at the bottom line what is being taught in the classroom is always at very best standard possible.  Therefore f you don't have excellent curriculum knowledge from the top then a few plebby teachers can ruin the stability of the school.  A shitty teacher = shitty parents = shitty school.

In my view, good leadership in schools comes not from economics but from exclusively employing exemplary, inspiring teachers with excellent knowledge of curriculum for the top jobs.  Yes, sure economics is important, as is being able to work out timetables and the like but these things can be learnt on the job (and let's face it, don't we all know trained monkeys who are able to work out timetables and meet with the accountant every 3 months?)

My view of leadership is not exactly shared by the Department of Education.  They speak of leading from experience and exemplary teaching but in fact the opposite is what is being pushed into leadership now.  Those on the road to leadership these days are groomed by Department heads more interested in management than Leadership.  There's a difference.  The moment schools become "managed" by business graduates who have an interest in economics rather than knowing exactly how to teach and lead curriculum is the moment schools lose out.

In my opinion a good school has personable managers, a healthy budget in surplus with excellent teachers who carry the load and get the job done.  An excellent school has a leadership team that could walk into any classroom and teach or help teachers plan a lesson in a way that inspires another teacher to be better at their job.  There is no surplus in the budget (perhaps just a rainy day fund) because the budget is used for resources, professional development and mentoring and to pay exemplary teachers extra money for excellent work and Leadership have a good idea of what the needs of staff and students are.

We are moving away from a model of excellent and moving towards 'good'.  This is horrific in my eyes.  I can see it happening right now in my place of work.  The latest promotion to a very senior leadership role at the school is a manager and not a leader and what is the most horrifying is that I know that this was desirable from the perspective of the school.

My idealism is crushed and my heart breaks for the kids and for the good teachers out there in Education.  We are heading down a very bad road by treating schools as companies or businesses.  Hiring a trained monkey may seem like a good economic choice but we are not in the business of economics.  We are in the business of learning and learning just happens to be a money pit politically speaking.  The thing is I don't care about the politics of it, I'm all about connecting the dots here.

If we hire trained monkeys at the top then what exactly do we expect is going to come out at the bottom?

Labels: a case of the leader not wanting to be lead, boss, education, leaders of the world they are, new leader, school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, teaching the teacher

posted by M at 1:17 am 9 comments

I have a question.  Now I understand questions on the Internet rarely get answered seriously, particularly those on a journal that is only semi-functional at best, but I'll give it a go anyway.  What have I got to lose?  If you happen to read this over the next couple of years just humour me, okay?

There are a lot of changes happening in the Education industry that unfortunately reflect the times we now live in.  Schools are regarded as businesses, students as clients and teachers as the sweat shop workers.  This means that when changes occur it usually goes that like this:

Labels: school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, work

posted by M at 12:17 am 4 comments

So... I'm thinking of not teaching any more.

I went into this job with high ideals that I haven't lost. Some of those ideals I understand are unreasonable. For instance, I understand that education is not exempt from the world of economics, even though I truly believe that money turns all good intentions bad. But that's not what I'm talking about. There are other ideals which are being compromised and I don't know that I can, philosophically speaking, continue down this path.

I honestly think

- We are making a big mistake from following ANY educational incentives that have originated in the US. ESPECIALLY those that have shown to be a waste of time and energy such as 'teach for America' - which coincidentally we are invoking here soon. Australia already has higher levels of literacy and numeracy than the US. They should be looking to us for the answers (not the other way round), WE should be looking to Finland who has shown to have one of the best educational systems in the world. Why aren't we? Well I think the general consensus is that teachers are treated like professionals and there is an emphasis on family responsibility in education too. Their tax system supports things like health care, child care and education - which feeds into their system of teaching and education in general. If we look to them then that assumes we are willing to change the way we live and function - that we feel that education is important. It's just easier to look at cost cutting measures that come out of the US and don't do a damn of good instead but look flashy to voters and parents who actually have no idea what really goes on inside a classroom.

- I really think that every single "new program" that I've seen introduced over the last 8 years has actually been detrimental to student learning.

- Private education does not need any more money pumped into it. End. Of. Story.

- I do more assessment on my 5 years olds now than I had done on me when I was IN YEAR 12. This is NOT an exaggeration. It's not needed. I don't understand on what planet that MORE assessment actually improves learning, especially when it comes at the expense of actually being able to teach the curriculum.

- new incentives come in. Teachers are asked to make time for them by "working smarter" which I think we can all agree is just a euphemism for 'we have no answers as to how you're going to do this, and we don't want to know how you're going to do it. Just get it done'.

- Parents are INSANE and I've seen less and less opposition to the crazy demands as the years go on. I can only imagine what will happen in 5 years.

- League tables to rank schools is the worst idea I've ever heard. Data proves nothing - and yet with this new development that's all we're going to be producing, schools will be run and exist only on data.

- Performance pay for teachers is BULLSHIT. We're not talking thousands and thousands of dollars for the extra work you do. We're talking - taking on major leading positions for an extra ONE thousand dollars. It's a load of shit. Pay teachers are real salary instead! God knows you ask enough of us - you want my liver?

And so I'm left in the unenviable position of knowing I'm a good teacher but knowing that being a good teacher has little to do with teaching. Either I leave or I try to change things. I don't know what to do.

Have you ever had your ideals completely challenged? What did you do?

Labels: questions, school, stressed teachers, teaching, wonderings

posted by M at 7:58 pm 9 comments

I feel like teaching is making me bitter and twisted.

I'm finding myself judging people namely stay at home parents (mums - let's face it) who don't actually do anything with their children in an educational sense before they come to school. I realise running a household is a full time job, but shouldn't part of the criteria of that particular full time job be going through the alphabet with their child once or twice? I'm disgusted by parents who have had 6-10 years at home apparently raising a family and their child comes to school not even knowing what the first letter of their name is. Maybe I'm just too uppity but all I want to do is call human services and scream neglect!

The reason for this is that I completely idealise the role of the stay at home parent in rearing a child in the early years before schooling. I think it is, bar none, the most important job in the world. It pisses me off to see children who come to school unable to form sentences, speak in monosyllables, don't recognise the alphabet and who have never picked up a pencil to do anything more than pick their nose with it. Talk about lazy parenting! It drives me crazy to hear 'well that's your job' (to teach the alphabet). It's such a passive way to parent. Even dogs get more training via the family than kids these days. This year over half my class know less than 6 letters of the alphabet coming into school. I work in a middle class area of town and I think it is quite frankly unacceptable for families that can afford to have a parent at home not to have invested time in that child in a mildly educational way in the 5 years before they come to school.

For fucks sake people, is it any wonder I'm bitter and twisted?

Labels: kids, school, soap box., stressed teachers

posted by M at 12:53 am 15 comments

chopped my hair off
curled it up
became a leader
still learning how to kick arse
went overseas
to cities that never close down
came back
bought a house
can't wait to make it into a home.

2009 is all about me.
finally!

Labels: about me, house, life, school, travel

posted by M at 9:59 pm 24 comments

I'm constantly amazed by the amount of people in "high places" that just DO. NOT. GET. IT.

A great example is the Education Department in Vic. Latest on the ever-increasing pile of crap that will eventually lead all teachers running from the profession is the banning of sugar from Victorian Schools. Now I don't actually have a problem with banning sugar from Victorian Schools. Whatever, good idea - I don't care. Hey I found a quote from Bronwyn Pike herself: "it is vital that we reinforce the healthy living message". Onya Bronny - true dat.

Oh but wait a sec, what's this? "Students will still be allowed to bring sweet treats to school in their lunchboxes". Ummm...what? So apparently this is yet another, let's put all the pressure on the schools to parade the old moral code and take all the pressure off the parents, trick. Great. Let's change things but not actually taking on the most important people in this equation (the parents, duh).

I don't understand why they bother regulating schools with spot checks for healthy food when apparently it doesn't matter what they bring from home in their lunch boxes anyway? I don't know how many times I've said it but the primary influence on young children is not school but their PARENTS. Is this such a difficult thing to understand? Why not do these so called "government spot checks" on student lunch boxes instead of on schools? I don't disagree with having a healthy eating policy in schools - just the opposite actually, but putting all the pressure on schools to enforce eating habits in children is completely missing the mark on promoting healthy eating. Bottom line, if parents can't do it their child isn't going to either. Target the parents. Target the fast food chains. Target advertising on the tele. Oh wait, this results in revenue lost? Ahhh..now we get to the bigger issue; Corruption. I'm sick of schools being a scape goat for problems that could easily be solved if the government/media/parents/workplaces were willing to lose some revenue doing it.

The other example of people in "high places" just NOT. GETTING. IT. comes again in the form of the government. Namely the Federal government and their new stance on internet filters.

Basically the proposal is that Australia will become the new China when it comes to internet filters. As in: all the good sites are banned. Why? Oh, a mixture of things including the internet being unsafe for children (porn, chat etc).

Here's an idea: How about parents control what their children can and can't do on the internet? I know, sounds like a radical idea - but it goes like this: When you have a child you commit to raising them. Raising them includes keeping them out of harms way. Keeping them out of harms way means that parents will actually have to be involved in their child's lives. And that means, less time on the xbox or with the mothers club and more time teaching your child about how to surf safely, be wary and be responsible. If that fails, ever heard of a Net Nanny? It was only invented about a million years ago when dinosaurs roamed the earth, geniuses. Why punish those of us who are barren of children by reducing the best bits of the internet just so parents can keep NOT raising their children? Why on earth people have children when they just don't want to raise them properly is beyond me.

But I don't blame the parents entirely. I'm aware that we live in a society that promotes long working hours and discriminates against stay at home mothers (or fathers) from job sharing or getting back into the work place after a while. Maternity leave is a joke and paternity leave is virtually non-existent! A lot of parents can't afford to take the time to raise their children these days not only because it's too hard to make ends meet - but because we (the people who live in this society) are fucking GREEDY. People want it all. Having it all involves having children AND living the life you had before you had kids and that is actually impossible unless you give up one little thing: Actually raising them.

It's a messy old web we weave. No wonder we just don't get it.

Labels: fake mad but not really, kids, obsessive parents, rant, school, stressed teachers

posted by M at 9:56 pm 10 comments

Yesterday in an effort to navigate the old key in the lock while simultaneously holding a rather too full handbag, a basket full of heavy folders and ....my lunch (why humans don't have three arms is beyond me. Obviously we need them!). I found myself in staring in full horror as my lovely external hard drive went from balancing rather perilously atop of my handbag to floating through the air to dropping SMACK onto hard concrete floor at my feet. I'm sure I heard it scream on the way down.

Just to clarify, that would be the hard drive that contains all of my weekly planners, photographs, music, REPORTS, learning plans, reviews and other official professional development files, resume and other documents of that ilk, planners I've been given (or outright stolen) from other teachers over the years... not to mention my own personal writing. Or to put it another way, every single file I have which is not yet backed up onto any other computer. Or ANOTHER way - my life.

Now when I plug in my HD it goes crunch, crunch, crunch, wiz, sad sound... device not recognised by computer on the Mac and on PC comes up on devise list but has a location of "0". How can it be there and NOT be there at the same time? I ask myself. I'm unable to actually access through Mac HD or My Computer though it's detected as "working properly".

oy dear. I've finally rendered an inanimate object as confused as I am. What an accomplishment!

I remain optimistic that putting it into the freezer will miraculously cure everything and it will work, right as rain in a few hours.

Just out of interest on a scale of 1-10 what are my chances of getting my data back via this method?

----

In other news, I need to get something off my chest re work and there seems to be noone about I can offload onto. Luckily I have my trusty blog to spew forth my petty grievances.

I happen to have that cough that has been going around lately. Much of my grade has come down with it, with a couple coming down with pneumonia. I've only had one sick day this year so I decided to take another today and due to cough getting worse, tomorrow too. This is all good, I have a certificate. I'm really sick! When a teacher gets sick they call an emergency in to cover for you.

Of course, prin decided that she wouldn't use my emergency teacher tomorrow to cover my grade. Oh no. Instead my grade is going to be split between the other classes and MY emergency teacher will be used as extra staff on a sports day.

I'm so angry because I'm OWED an emergency teacher. Why should my grade be split up - which causes an inconvenience to not only my children but also to the other teachers in the school? Why should other teachers be punished by having extra children in their classes all day? Why should I lose a sick day when in reality my grade doesn't even see the benefit of it? It's ludicrous! So what am I going to do? Well I'm going to pack a packet of butter menthols and turn up at school tomorrow, that's what. I'm just fuming about having to do so when it's my right to be sick when I'm sick instead of being put in this position. I'm angry because there is no way that I can phone the prin now and say that I've heard that she's splitting my grade and therefore I'm coming in. No, I'm going to have to call prin and pretend that I'm all better.

Yesterday I was telling a friend of mine that teachers are chickenshit because we care about others. That has cost us not only a decent wage but everyday rights as workers. As VP says "we are the ultimate service industry". Indeed, I've just proven him right. I'd love to say a big fuck you to everyone, but in the end my children suffer and I'll get the brunt of the bad vibes because - wow I'm sick and everyone else has to suffer because of it. No thanks. :(

Labels: computer stuff, geeks, humans are dumb because we don't have three arms even though necessity clearly dictates that we should, rant, school, stressed teachers

posted by M at 3:19 pm 18 comments

I was going to write a zillion word rant but I'll keep it short and simple.

My team leader talks a lot but doesn't actually know very much - she's good at organising meetings but not actually contributing. I think that if you're a team leader then you should know the most, work the hardest and pick up the slack. That's what you get paid for, after all.

Today out of 7 hours of planning our team leader contributed very little. In fact. Nothing - though she did a lot of photocopying. If I worked in the corporate world I'd enjoy sitting back and watching the car crash but I don't. I work in an industry where actually, contrary to popular belief 90% of us do it because we really care about children - so if someone fucks up it's not the leader who crashes and burns but instead the rest of us and the kids.

This means that today I picked up the slack and am STILL continuing to contribute all alone when I really should be saying flush off flushles and not caring about it. I hate caring that it even gets done. I'm really pissed off that I'm doing the work and not getting paid for it. I'm sick of working really hard only to find more work to do on the other side. I'm angry with myself for feeling accountable to the children.

Labels: rant, school, stressed teachers, work

posted by M at 9:48 pm 13 comments

Finally. FINALLY a politician has come out and said what needed to be said re: education. It's so simple and full of common sense that I'm surprised it isn't said more often, or quite frankly done more often.

Barak Obama would have my vote (if it counted), based only on this speech, if nothing else. Surely a man who is so practical in this area must be practical in other areas too.

Here's the taped footage..



But for those of you unwilling to watch (oh it's an eye opener alright) - he hits gold at about the 3 minute mark with this gem:

“It’s not good enough for you to say to your child, ‘Do good in school,’ and then when that child comes home, you’ve got the TV set on,”

“You’ve got the radio on. You don’t check their homework. There’s not a book in the house. You’ve got the video game playing.”

“So turn off the TV set. Put the video game away. Buy a little desk. Or put that child at the kitchen table. Watch them do their homework. If they don’t know how to do it, give ‘em help. If you don’t know how to do it, call the teacher.”

“Make ‘em go to bed at a reasonable time! Keep ‘em off the streets! Give ‘em some breakfast! Come on! Can I get an amen here?”

“You know I’m right,”

“And, since I’m on a roll, if your child misbehaves in school, don’t cuss out the teacher! You know I’m right about that! Don’t cuss out the teacher! Do something with your child!”

HELL YES! FINALLY the truth is out. Parents, need to parent. Weird idea I know, but the way I see it is if you have them, then you should raise them. Education doesn't stop and start at the school gate.

I can't remember any time when any politician has made such a statement about individual responsibility - that is, even though it's true. The students I see succeeding are students who:

1) come from money (I don't necessarily mean rich but I do mean they don't have many worries about money for instance; they DO NOT have to worry about the basics, food, water, shelter - and by extension emotional support - yes it's related)
2) come from families that INSIST, hard line, on all those things Obama talks about in his speech.

It's not about catering for gifted and talented children. Or blaming teachers for not teaching properly and thus creating a panic about our test results (for the record Australia has one of the BEST education systems in the world, backed up by world data (OECD - PISA). However the way the media carries on you'd think we were failing). Bottom line is that we need to start being practical about this stuff.

How do we expect kids to learn, if they aren't getting any support at home? Any teacher in the world will tell you that it is a FACT that children who don't get home support by and large struggle. If they don't then they are doing so against the odds. We see exactly how home life helps and hinders children in the classroom. Thinking a child turns the home switch off when they enter a classroom is a mistake politicians have made for far too long when it comes to making policies about in classroom curriculum. This is not the way to improve the way kids learn. We can't ignore the influence of the most important people in a child's life: their parents! It's time a mirror was held up. I'm glad the day has come.

------

Enough ranting, onto Musical Monday - which takes me back to the early 90s waiting for the school bus on windy spring afternoons with my friend Gil. The bus stop was in front of this charming, well maintained art deco house inhabited by a lovely elderly gent who would always wander outside to chat to the youngsters stepping all over his roses with scruffy black shoes and socks that just wouldn't stay up. One day - and I remember it well for some reason - Gil told me about this band she'd heard about called The Sundays - and they, along with Ratcat were her new favourite bands. I thought it sounded like a whimsical name for a band and later discovered they really were rather whimsical sounding in music as well.

Whenever I hear The Sundays I think of Gil and springtime and how we impatiently waited for the bus every afternoon, and how often I'd just pack it in and walk home instead - stopping every few meters to pull up my socks and adjust the volume on my walkman.

I heard the old guy died not too long after I finished high school. I drove past that art deco house the other day but it was graffitied and condemned. I wonder why no one has bought and renovated it? It's a sad sight and a ghostly remainder from a more glorious time.

Here's Where the Story Ends - The Sundays

Labels: memories, money, musical monday, nostalgia, political musings, school, stressed teachers, yes I am taking politics

posted by M at 9:25 pm 18 comments

Dear Ikea shopper,

You are a big wanker. Wanker, Wanker, Wanker, Wanker, WANKER, WANKER, WANKER! ARGH!!

You've got your crappy do-it-yourself bed now MOVE ALONG CHUMP! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!

No, you DON'T have to double check every single FUCKING package at the checkout! Just don't! DON'T! You don't say to the checkout lady "hm, I think I might have 8 items" when in fact she scanned 7 and then spend the NEXT FIVE MINUTES searching endlessly for this mystery 8th item THAT ISN'T EVEN THERE. She scanned 7, GREAT! You just count your lucky stars that you're not paying for 8 and MOVE THE FUCK ALONG! No, don't INSIST on looking for it! The only think I insist is that you are a GRADE A (in capitals) WANKER. You know when you SHOULD have done that shit? WHEN YOU AND WIFEY WERE GETTING IT OFF THE FUCKING SHELF. Yes, checking items when you get them off the shelf may be like inventing fire to idiots like you but I maintain that it's a GREAT time to make sure you have your shit together. Guess what? There's TWO of you. that means that one gets it off the shelf and the other one DOES NOT STAND THERE GIGGLING LIKE SOME MORON, it's her job to check the shit so that you don't embarrass yourselves at the counter. How's that for a plan, team USA? Why would that be a good idea? Oh I don't know, maybe it's because people like me who know what they want are standing right behind you with my 1 item that should me about 2 MINUTES to get through the register with.. but nooooooo you turn what should have been an easy 2 minute journey into a 15 minute HELL RIDE TO SHITSVILLE!

I hate you....wanker!

Love,
Ikea shopper who actually knows what they are doing.




Dear people in charge of my Education region,


That conversation we had the other day really depressed me. I really felt like that was the last thing I needed to hear about my profession that day. I'm already hanging on by a thread.

For the record, no I don't think that teachers get too much PD and no I don't think that we should be doing more in house PD instead of going out and getting trained by specialists. No I don't think we should be letting the information filter down from teacher to teacher. When exactly do you think we have time to do all this in house networking? Do you realise how exhausted a day of teaching makes you? No, of COURSE you don't, you're a paper pusher. I don't think you understand very much at all. If you stop training teachers to be BETTER teachers then you will get exactly what you foster: CRAP TEACHERS WHO NEVER LEARN ANYTHING NEW.

I feel sad. I feel abandoned by the very people who are supposed to represent my needs. But you don't. You represent the almighty dollar. I don't know if I want to be part of your organisation anymore.

You suck!

Love,

Disillusioned teacher.




Dear Parent who came into my classroom today,

Thank you for saying what you said. Yes I'm chuffed that my group of parents "feel very, very lucky to have Miss F as a teacher". I thought it would be the opposite because of the art room thing. Personally I think being in the art room for a couple of years has made me a better CLASSROOM teacher than I was before but I never thought that parents would give me a chance. I thought I would have been eaten alive without a trail. I'm so happy that you said that my reputation pre-art and in the classroom proceeded me.

Thank you!

Love,

Your Daughter's Teacher.




Dear Friend,

I love you, I really do but I think it's totally bogan to go to the bottle shop and buy one of those little bottles of bubbly and drink it at a restaurant without ordering anything else.

Sorry, no I won't join you in a glass - I'm going to actually order something off the menu.

Am a bit Shocked to tell you the truth.

Me.




Dear S,

No, updating your "status" as "moving house" isn't actually the same as letting someone know that you've moved. We've only known each other for ooo... 18 years so I thought I'd at least qualify for a text.

Access to technology is great but it's not a substitute for good old fashioned courtesy.

Love,

Well, Not Love...Obviously.





Dear #1,

Love Baby S. I really do. I will sit and listen to all the crappy stories about how he bumps into walls and won't fall asleep. I'll sympathise and empathise and other "ises" ...anything, you're my friend. HOWEVER, being at the 1st birthday party was excruciating! I hated every second of it. It's no place for a single gal. You babied up folk are ...well you're really down right scary sometimes. It's frightening and I wanted to leave about 10 minutes after I got there. I really don't belong and I'm not sure I want to belong either. You're all cuckoo for coco pops - sorry but it's true. I hope you're not offended. I DID buy a really cool present.

Love,

Weirded out by babied up people.



Dear Mazda Driver,

I have memorised your car. Get on the Freeway going 80kms again and I swear to God I will hunt you down and rip out your still-beating heart. You think I have anger management issues? Well you're quite possibly right but you STILL need to get the in the left lane and STAY THERE FOREVER bucko! Or better yet, take a taxi. I don't understand why people like you even WANT to get on the freeway in the first place. What's the attraction: Pissing people off? We have plenty of roads out there where you can go 60kms or EVEN 40kms on school days! Sounds like your kind of speed to me.

Love

Late for Work and other Appointments.

Labels: Crazy Nutters, crazy people, letters, rant, school

posted by M at 10:47 pm 11 comments

me: J if you keep kissing the girls you're going to make them cry!
J: *grinning*
me: no, I'm serious. You're not allowed to do this anymore or I'm going to make you marry the very next girl you kiss and you're going to have to go straight out to get a job so you can support her.
J: *looking a little worried*.

The thing is I've got this little Don Juan in my grade. He's all of 5 and has all the charm in the world nestled in his pinky finger and has used this to great advantage in order to erm...go through many girls in my grade. He has also been caught kissing with girls twice his age and flirting with anyone who will pay him attention.

Many years ago now I taught his brother and let me tell you - his brother had none of this special charm. There was no kissing of girls with him. In fact, as I remember girls were pretty much only just a mouth on legs that used the "other" toilets - nothing interesting in them at all. Meanwhile, Prince Charming 2008 is wowing them left right and center. I find the whole business fascinating.

Is charm something in the gene or something learned? There are some people that seem to naturally possess a certain kind of charm. It's just in their manner, the way that they seem to put everyone at ease, not just the target of their fancy. I maintain that charming people are utterly charming to everyone, the other kind (charming only to those you want to impress) of person is smarmy, not charming. The other kind has a little bit of Georgie Porgie about him.

Somehow J has inherited this special charm quality while his older brother did not. I feel that J will have a better time of it somehow...well that is until the inevitable happens: the backlash. Already there are niggles of it. One girl has said that she is J's girlfriend and another retorted that "no, *I'M* his girlfriend!!". Uh oh, this could get ugly - girls are into commitment and they're not going to be nice about it when things go wrong.

Do you think charm is born or learned?
Know any Prince Charmings? Do you fall easily for that - is it impossible not to?
How about Georgie Porgie? Was he a man misunderstood or simply a sleaze bag?
Is there a fine line between Prince Charming and Georgie Porgie? Is it all in the eyes of the beholder?

Labels: school, stressed teachers, talking about being a gentleman

posted by M at 7:18 pm 13 comments

me - Hey, how was your first assembly yesterday kids?
kid - it was good, you know we sang that song: Australians all in Ostriches. It was funny.
me - ...you mean Australians all let us rejoice...?
kid - um...maybe.
(I guess we need to go through that national anthem thingy).


frowny kid - why do you always smile?
me - hm?
frowny kid - well you're always smiling. I don't always feel like smiling so I don't always smile.
me - well, I like smiling, it's nice. You could do with a little more smiling you know! Besides, it's one of our rules!
(Like, it really is. It's on the board in bold letters and everything. Everyone must smile!)

Corey Haim kid - you know how you were away yesterday?
me - yep, sure do
CHK - well, that teacher we had, I forget her name ...or something. She was speaking a different language ...or something. I never understood anything she said. She didn't speak English!
me - oh really? *checking records of who was in the classroom*
CHK - I think she was Italian or something like that.
me - um, she was Irish! She was speaking English!
CHK - oh.
(I suppose it can be hard to tell. I mean the accent is so gorgeous that you really don't care what they're saying half the time do you?!)

Mum - I don't understand this body corporate. Why is there such a thing?
me - it pays for all those things you might want to use in the building plus maintaining the property
Mum - It's like communism, you pay someone else to tell you when you can have a bath, or what food you can eat. Everyone is stuck in the same paying for things they don't even want!
(God, well when she puts it like that, I really can't argue. Perhaps I should cross that one off my list).

me - you doing anything special with the man on vday?
C - well this is the one day of the year that he cooks! So we're having dinner in.
me - how lovely! What do you think he'll cook?
C - I know he's going to cook pancakes.
me - ...pancakes?
C - It's actually the only thing he knows how to cook. He does those shake the bottle ones.
me - oh. my. god...that is so romantic!
C - I know! I'm going to get him chocolates.
(you see guys, no one - worth knowing- is actually expecting a bloody diamond! Just being yourself is nice!)

me - S was upset because none of the other girls brought their babies to dinner. She wanted little N to meet all their babies!
#1 - err..it's not like little N is really going to remember meeting some randoms at a dinner one night. He's a baby!
me - exactly, it's not like they're really going to be exchanging business cards and making dates to meet up at the local pub later!
(I mean seriously. Sometimes babies can be left at home with dad. Dad is also a parent. Dad is in fact the OTHER parent!!

The past two weeks have had me play host to a couple of important people in the classroom. One was Mr school Counselor who has been visiting every grade (trying to get a feel for the wackos probably) and a parent who also happens to be a teacher, who wanted to clock up some volunteer hours in my class. I was a bit nervous having other adults in the classroom after so long out of the classroom - especially since school counselor actually has to work with me as a peer and he also happens to be a parent of a child in the class next door - so comparisons will be made. Meanwhile having one single parent making judgments on your teaching is basically the kiss of death if things go wrong. Sometimes parental opinion comes in the form of lemmings jumping off a cliff you see.

Anyway, both counselor and parent said wonderful complimentary things - even going so far as to praise the way I had my classroom organised in comparison with the other grades (including the counselor's child's class). It's made me feel a whole lot more at ease with my teaching and that the hard work is paying off. My class is still difficult but I've worked damn hard to get them to where they are now, which is nowhere near where I want them to be but has been garnering a lot of compliments from their other specialist teachers. It's very cool.

random question - answer honestly: Are you completely repulsed or strangely fascinated by all the cyst/boil removal videos on You Tube? I have to say, I can watch that shit all day. Sorry - but it's true. I'm really into freaky stuff like that. Apologies if you find this revelation about my good self unbearable and now want to stop reading!

Labels: friends, quotegirl, school, weird things

posted by M at 9:07 pm 18 comments

I'm having this little issue with a co-worker of mine. Recently she's taken over a team leader position in my area of teaching. Within this team she is the most experienced teacher, however she is not the most experienced in terms of having taught at this level before. There are two other teachers who are more experienced in teaching this grade than her and one of those teachers is me. This is a rather important point because kids at the level I teach at are unlike any other grade in the school. They are so far beyond what would be considered normal that you can't even compare it to teaching in any other grade. I know because I have taught other grades and the first time I came to teach this grade I was so unprepared for how different it was that it wasn't funny.

Anyway, this new leader is, I think, feeling threatened by the fact that this is all so overwhelming to her and in order to lift her own profile she keeps making condescending comments to me. In fairness she hasn't known me in any other role except as the art teacher and obviously I was sensitive about that perception when coming back into the classroom, but I've had enough of it now. Today she made a rather obvious comment about needing to enter names into the database - I mean, no shit right? - but it was something, incidentally (and rather surprisingly) she needed clarification about herself. I guess she felt embarrassed about not knowing how to do this herself that she wanted to appear more competent than someone else so ...why not pick on the art teacher? Unfortunately by that stage I'd had enough of little children crying at me all day that I just snapped Yeah I know, I *have* been working with his program *in the classroom* for about 5 years. rrraaow! I totally called her out and ...well, was a bit awkward after that. Now things are weird. I hate that.

For the most part I'm a rather easygoing person to deal with in real life. I do call people on their bullshit, don't get me wrong, but I rarely confront people with anger, especially in a work environment. I'd rather check my own ego if it means keeping the peace - which is what usually ends up happening. This is so at odds with how I deal with things on the internet where I'll just say exactly what I think at all times. If I don't then it's not because I respect you so much that I can't possibly say what I really think, it's just that I think you can't handle a discussion/comment beyond a 'yes ma'am' or 'yes sir'. Basically I think you'll pussy out and I'm don't care to deal with the wah wah bullshit that goes along with that. But in the work environment I will take one for the team - not if I truly believe something to be wrong - but when it comes to little disputes then yes.

Now, I'm not so sure of how to handle this one.

Do I keep on asserting that yes, yes I've been there done that - I'm much more experienced in teaching a grade than I am teaching art?

Do I just ignore the whole situation?

Do I go to her for the answer to a really obvious question that will re-establish the - you leader, me pleb - role?

Do I say fuck it and take the whole school and all the children down with me in a blaze of glory?

Labels: school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, teaching the teacher, work

posted by M at 8:39 pm 12 comments

Me: So what are you hoping to learn about at school?
kid - lunch!
Um..no.

random teacher: hey, so how's it going?
me: I'm on my 10th cup
random teacher: whoa, okay - not too good then I take it.
Um...true.

me: When you have rules at home and you don't follow those rules what happens?
loudmouth #1: Um..well...um... you know...sometimes...um
(thinking; t, t, t, today junior!)
...um sometimes when you're bad maybe your mum might say "no you can't go to Gemma's birthday party anymore!!"
me: oohhhhh kay that's very ...specific..
loudmouth #2 - or maybe your own birthday gets called OFF!!
yes, you see sometimes it's best not to make "links to the real world" because the "real world" is a scary, scary place

ohhh, J you're being such a good boy today! I'm so impressed with how brave you are.
(J looks at me and starts crying...again).
Best to just keep out of it sometimes.

calling out girl: um...what are these nice clothes?
me: dress ups!
cog: can I.....?
me: no!
cog: can...?
me: no, no you can't, not today.
cog: c..
me: not today hon.
cog; tomorrow?
me: ....um...
cog: (looking at me expectantly).
me: .....nup!
I'm not being mean, just practical. I really don't feel like THAT much tidying up at the end of a 12 hour day!

kid: Miss F, I think you forgot to give us all personal points!
me: (looking at chart where only one child has a personal point sticker) - no, I didn't forget at all.
kid: but, I don't have one.
me: no, no you don't.
It's a harsh life.

cryer: (grabs onto hand) I want you to stay outside with me. You can't go!
me: but hon, I have to go inside
cryer: whyyyyy? (squeezing hand)
me: because I'm really hungry and I want to eat my lunch. You already got to eat your lunch and you wouldn't even let me have any of your chocolate. I'm HUNGRY!
cryer: nooooo you stay here!
me: (trying to inch away) I have lasagna waiting for me and did I mention I was really HUNGRY?
cryer: stay!
me: how about having a play in the sand pit. It's so much fun!
cryer: I want to stay with you!
me: oohh, look there's your big brother I bet he'd LOVE to look after you
(big bro trying to inch away but have already grabbed his hand)
me: look K, your sister would like to play with you. BYEEEEEEEEEE (run)
Survival of the fittest

So as you can see, I'm buggered.

Labels: school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, work

posted by M at 10:03 pm 15 comments

I awoke this morning to a text message from ex art teacher (who is coming back to do art this year) asking me whether I was coming in to school this week because if so we could meet and do a quick handover of the art program/key/info. I almost went into hyperventilation mode while reading it. No, I'm not quite ready to be so formal yet. Sure, I actually went into school for two very long, hard, messy days last week to clean my room and get it ready (is there any other job where the workers are made to clean their own office and rearrange the furniture and even in my case BRING IN MY OWN furniture?) - so the point is, I already went in early last week so I didn't have to do it now.

The text this morning reminded me that my time as a lady of leisure is almost over. It also made me feel nervous. Going back to the classroom is a big change from the art role - the biggest part of this change is having once again to deal with parental influence and pressure. For the most part I think I handle the pressure quite well and get along with most parents. But on the other hand there are a few parents who do make a teacher's life a living hell and those parents are the ones that end up overruling all the lovely ones. The way to make a teacher's life hell is not by requesting interviews, or by wanting more homework, or even by ringing them to discuss their child. All this stuff, I want the parents to do. I want them to be diligent about their child's reading as I am. I want them to strive for the best. The problems occur only when the parents are completely off the planet with their demands and/or are aggressive. The year level I'm going back to teach is by far the worst in terms of parental pressure on teachers, until probably year 12 VCE High School.

My non teacher friends don't quite believe my stories of being interrupted in the middle of lessons by parents who are pissed about something, or being told that they rule the school and that they can get anything they want done so watch out (this was actually said to a teacher I know), or dealing with parent teacher interviews where the parents actually REFUSE to leave (dude, you get 10 minutes like everyone else!) or parents who shout, are aggressive, complain to the prin instead of coming straight to you (news flash, prin has no idea what you're going on about), blame the teacher if their child loses a jumper (like as if we're stockpiling them or something) - and the best one, those that will stand outside the classroom with their noses pressed right into the window so they can see what's going on (not offputting for the child at all!). You see, when I relate these stories to my friends, they think I'm exaggerating - as I tend to do most times. The thing is, they all have jobs where the client has to make an appointment in order to see management and they all are in workplaces where there are rules of conduct that are actually followed by their clients. They can't quite believe that someone would be harassed like that in their place of work. Well, believe it - there isn't a teacher alive out there who doesn't have a horror story.

Anyway, the point is, thinking about this makes me extremely nervous. I'm about to get my world rocked when honestly I prefer people to be more easy going. It'll be tough.

The other day I was researching alternative education on the web. I've always been interested in alternative education - that is education that is not run by the state or private schools. I mean, independent schools where they are a law unto themselves. I came across a school run by a quite well known children's book author - that is located just outside of Melb. The school sounds interesting and is so unlike the experiences of a general education that I do wonder how things operate.

The principal wanted to create a school that was based about what schools were like back before the bureaucracy got a hold of the reigns and started controlling everything. The website of the school outlines it's educational approach which all seem very run of the mill except when you get to the last point. Food should not to be brought to school, as we provide morning tea and lunch and snacks in-between. Lollies, chewing gum and soft drinks are not to be brought to school at any time. We cater for allergies and special diets. Interesting and you know, I like it. There is another school in Melbourne that has a similar philosophy on food and cooking (scroll down). More and more schools I've had contact with are rejecting not only cooking in the school, but also the sharing of food or if they do cooking it is not eaten because of the risk of a) contamination. b) allegries. Back when I was at school we cooked, we ate, we shared food, we had parties with food. News flash! Food is part of being human. Let's embrace that fact again. It makes me sad that food is so feared in our society: due to the so called (scaremongering) obesity epidemic or to other factors such as allergies and other controlling forces.

The other part of this particular school that impressed me in particular was the "is this school right for you?" page. Basically, it's the school laying down the law and saying; this is what we do, if you don't like it then pick somewhere else to send your child. It's nothing that is out of the ordinary either. It's just about respecting the school environment. I heartily agree with #10 which states We are very happy for parents to be involved in the life of the school, in all kinds of rich, exciting and rewarding ways. We work on an `invitation-acceptance’ or an `offer-acceptance’ basis. In other words, we may invite parents to contribute to the school in some way, and they may accept our invitation; equally they may offer to help us in some way and we may accept their invitation. However we are not happy with parents who want to impose their own agendas on the school, and we don’t tolerate parents who attempt to bully the school, teachers, or other students.. You get the feeling that this rule is actually upheld and that's a good thing.

But my favourite philosophy behind both schools, and many alternative education schools is their stance on free time. Nowadays free time is a dirty word to most parents and especially to the department. Free time implies that the time is idle and wasted. But to me, free time is always where you learn the most because you are left to your own devices. It's no secret that most of what we learn we actually learn through experimentation and play. All those things we, as adults, do that grabs and holds our attention is achieved through experimentation and choice - with a camera, or a paintbrush, some words, or a book or whatever it is that we do when we are not actually forced to do anything. Free time doesn't mean "not learning" free time means researching something for yourself, it means tactile, it means feeding your imagination. The things that stick out in our minds are the things that we have pioneered and discovered for ourselves or with others in tow. Free time is an important part of school life that has been lost in both the private and government sector because of fear that we are not 'doing our jobs and teaching'. It's become corrupted by this view that giving a child free time will mean they are not learning anything. This point of view is so ignorant it makes me ill. I feel sorry for those children whose whole day is organised, from school all day which is organised into little sections of learning to after school where often they partake in some new kind of organised learning as well - sport, dance, language, play dates. I speak to so many parents who are basically chauffeurs on the weekend too. It's sad. I'm finding that these alternative schools put a lot of value in free time and thank God. Obviously it's not something that is done excessively - but rather it's just something that is seen as important.

The school has only been running a couple of years and I do wonder what kind of student the school will produce after a few years - and indeed what will that student be like as an adult and as an older student in a mainstream high school. Will they be wildcats who are behind in learning and unable to function in the real world or will they be the pioneers of an independent mind, creativity and cooperation - active in creating a new kind of world?

For the record, I don't agree with all facets of alternative education - nor to I disagree with all ways in which public or private schools are run.

But what say you? Would you ever consider alternative education for your own child? Was it a choice you ever entertained but decided against? Never considered it? Were you a child of alternative education? Know people who are into it? Hate the way that schools are run but still aren't putting your money where your mouth is by sending your child somewhere else? I'd love to know your thoughts!

Labels: childhood, questions, school, stressed teachers, teaching, teaching the teacher, wonderings

posted by M at 2:40 pm 23 comments

Me - I'm sooo not ready for the end of the year. I've got so much still left to do. I'm moving rooms next year.
#2 - I got offered a new room. The new room is actually a lot better than the one I have now but there is no way I'm going through the pain of moving.
R - I would seriously rather teach in a hole than move rooms again.
Me - haha.
R - moving is the worst!
Me - yep, tell me about it.

It's not just the physical pain of moving but also the mental drain of knowing that you have to set up a whole different room from scratch - not to mention the mental switch moving to a whole new type of teaching. I'm wondering if I remember how to do it.

The hardest bit to deal with though are the emotions I'm going though about leaving. It's harder than I expected it would be. Every piece of work I take down I'm thinking about that child and the effort they put in, I'm think of my own teaching and guidance that helped achieve that result and I'm thinking of the joy it's brought to so many people who have walked past and stopped, looked and commented. Taking the work down is a process I need to go through in order to leave it behind properly. I'm leaving behind a wonderful team, a space I have perfected to my own tastes, a bazillion motivated children and most importantly my autonomy. I'm going to miss that and I know I'm giving it up to work under a leader I quite frankly don't respect all that much to do work that will, I already know, not be appreciated for whom I do it for. I need the challenge though.

I've received a lot of cards and lovely presents this year. It's really the words I take with me more than anything else. Words about flourishing children. Words of thanks and praise. Words saying that for the first time ever they are seeing their children enjoy art. Affirming, lovely words that lift my spirits. These words are very important to me because in a profession like teaching (and nursing too I'm sure is similar) you hear all the complaints but none of the compliments. When there's something wrong, you get words straight away: Words in letters, words in cards, threatening, spitting, accusing, hissing words. When you do good, it's the rare parent that notices or thinks to give a gift of words. We use them everyday and they cost nothing - and yet when it comes to giving them nicely we hesitate...

I guess I'm saying that it's an easy present to give and yet it brings a lot of joy. So, you've got a day left before the holidays (Victorians) - do it.

Labels: christmas, school, stressed teachers, teaching, teaching the teacher, words

posted by M at 10:57 pm 9 comments

*child screaming somewhere in the background*
bro - ...I hate those fucking whiny kids. That is one annoying sound.
me - you think THAT'S annoying? Multiply the sound by about a zillion times and keep it going for 45 minutes straight and you have that tantrum boy I had to deal with today.
bro - God.
me - yeah, tell me about it.
bro - what you should do is hire an inside man to pretend to be a prep.
me - WTF? Like a 25 year old Billy Maddison guy?
bro - no, no hear me out this is a good plan. You get this midget to pretend to be one of them and he can influence them. He'd be in your pocket the whole time and every time you want the kids to do something you tell midget guy and he'll set it up for you from the inside. He can be their little ring leader but really he's working for you.
me - .....that is not a bad idea. Where do I get a midget from?

The situation with the grades next year has gotten very bad. My grade is loaded with tough cases to the point where I'm about to just walk and not look back. I truly wish I could, but in the end I'm a dreamer with my feet planted firmly in the practical. I can't afford to just quit my job. What is upsetting me about the situation is not so much the "hard grade" itself it's the fact that things could be swapped around so that everyone has even grades but it's not being done, it's that I've had two changes to my grade which have both brought in even more tough kids and seen leave nicer ones and my grade was ALREADY loaded beforehand, it's the fact that I'm not being listened to and supported now which means I will be left to fend for myself next year also.

I know what it looks like when you have an unruly grade and I'm already battling with the stigma of being the art teacher going in to teach a grade. This is a huge stigma to deal with despite the fact that I've been a prep teacher before and I pretty much specialise in the early years of schooling. It's where my expertise are. People have short memories though and I know this more than anyone. The last thing I want as a professional is for my grade to be loaded to the point where people will look at them and judge everything I do MORE harshly than usual. It will have impact on my future teaching career because parents are notorious and terrible gossips out in the yard. Of course we will judge their parenting skills too, so I understand this is not a one way street - it's just that they can keep on having kids even if they are shit parents (see Britney Spears) whereas if the parents complain too loudly about us we get a bad name and parents start protesting about being in our grade. It can have devastating consequences as the teaching industry is actually a small one in terms of gossip, things tend to stick. You can go to a whole new school and everyone will know about your past - good or bad - within a month. Having a grade loaded with "issues" is like someone giving you a portfolio to work on that has little chance of succeeding. I mean sure, you deal with the situation and maybe inspiration will strike and you can beat things down but at the same time, if your end of year bonus depends on making it work and you can't because well, it was always set up to fail then you're certainly not going to be given MORE of a chance the next year are you...you'll probably get dumped with the crappy cases again.

Anyway the whole thing has really just depressed me. I'll just add it to the list of shitty things that have been going on lately.. I can't think of anything genuinely nice that has happened to me in ...well a very long time. God knows I've tried to rectify my myriad of dicey situations but to no avail.. I need a stiff drink.

Labels: bro, conversations, school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas, teaching, wonderings

posted by M at 9:24 pm 22 comments

It's started: The bitching. This is the one part of classroom teaching I did not miss while being the art teacher. That is; formulating the grade lists and the bitching that inextricably follows. It happens IMO because things are not fairly done. My philosophy on life is that everything MUST be fair for all. I am not one of those people that handle unfairness or favouritism well. Since life isn't very fair then you can imagine how much trouble I have dealing with things in everyday life. I don't simply say 'oh well, that's a spot of bother and just deal' oh no. I stew. I muse, I think, I brood, I get angry and I almost explode if things are not balanced. If things can be made fair then I want them to be fair. To me, that's just the way things should be - even to the point of knowing that if I have it 'too good' that it's time for me to give up some of mine so that others around me can be balanced.

When it comes to formulating grade lists I'm extremely practical about it. I feel that where possible:
1) spread out the pains, painful parents, lovelies, smarties, nutters and weirdos so that everyone has some of each.
2) every child should get a friend - but not have any grades loaded with a group of about 7 girls who "just can't be separated" what bollocks!
3) balanced grades in terms of gender, academic strengths/weaknesses.
4) no child to be with anyone that they are scared of or who we've heard they don't get along with.

In my opinion, this makes the grades more or less balanced. It gives each grade a variety of children with enough like minds to make learning groups of differing abilities. Ie: a normal classroom. Meanwhile Prin's idea of formulating class groups is to think about which kinder they came from or daycare centre and lump them in together with who they spent their last year with. Not only does this undermine teacher judgment of who we think do and don't work well together but it also means that certain grades get loaded with kids from a wonderful thorough kinder and other grades get loaded with the kids from creche who sadly do nothing more than roll around on the floor.

Guess which grade I have my name against for next year? Yep, plus one notorious parent with a child who every teacher already knows (she doesn't even go to the school yet but yes, we all know to look out). This particular parent almost demolished one teachers rep a couple of years ago just because she didn't like him. There is also a child whose brother I taught in my second year of teaching and by golly these parents are ...not nice. There's also the sister of JB. Now, in case you don't remember JB I'm going to refer you back to this post. Apparently his sister exhibits the same tendencies as her brother. I have to say, these days I just adore JB and I was right, of course he dose have aspergers and is still rather strange (but calmed down a lot). In this proposed grade of mine there's TWO OTHER children who don't talk and two with suspected processing issues. Fab.

If all the grades looked like this I wouldn't have a problem, but it's only my grade that looks like a bomb hit it. It's not a case of Prin thinking that I can handle all these "issues". It's just that she didn't want to split children up from the kinder they went to in order to make the grades more fair.

Anyway, suffice to say. I'm really not happy about the situation and of course the team knows it and rather they also know there's nothing I can do about it because Prin doesn't want to hear it. Though I'm using this vehicle of blog to vent, I really don't want to ruin everyone else's nice grades by going to Prin either. I don't want to be the teacher that can't handle it. It's a shit situation and I don't know how to make it nicer for myself. Teaching a grade of prep children is probably the hardest teaching position in the school (I know, since I've been around a bit now) and that's with a normal grade. I hate to think about what's going to happen next year if this grade stays the way it's set out now.

***

Like Amanda, was looking at my recent search engine history and was pleasantly surprised to see that the smut that usually drives people here has been been somewhat curtailed for now. I gather then that I must finally be high brow! Yay! Well maybhe not, but it's interesting to see what bring people here. Even if it has nothing to do with drunk nuns. Once query I thought needed answering..

you know you Melbournian when you

* have at one stage or another whether you are drunk or not sung the words to a your footy team's theme song OR at least to Up There Cazaly.
* Wear layers of clothes that can be easily peeled off or put on depending on the weather. One never assumes..
* love John So even though you really know nothing about him except that he's mayor and has an accent.
* Know where the nearest umbrella is at all times (though really not relevant for the past three years).
* Either love or hate Federation Square but agree that the concrete wasteland full of skater bogans that was there before was waaaay worse.
* Would never swim in the Yarra River, not even for a thousand dollars but LOVE seeing others do it, especially if they are from the Northern states (teehee).
* Remember who Carmen Chan is, or know someone who knows someone who knows someone who lived near her when it all happened.
* you drink real coffee (or are trying to give up), and none of that Starbucks shit either. In fact you look down upon Starbucks. Come to think of it you laugh rather heartily when other people say they got good coffee in say Adelaide or BrisV that one time.
* Have feared the wrath of a Tram driver who dings you with is ferocious bell of doom. DOOOOM!
* Have met someone at Flinders Street Station (and were late - ...and made the joke about being on 'Hurstbridge time' or something).
* Have actively avoided that derro on Smith Street who talks to himself.
* Have seen the bearded large guy who wears dresses on Brunswick Street.
* Still think nostalgically of the silver space suit street busker that would dance weirdly to electronic space music on the corner of Burke and Swanston St.
* Know that eating out is pretty much a pleasure wherever you go. Awesome food, almost everywhere.
* You can find your way to Haighs Chocolates with your eyes closed.
* You've frozen your tits (or other) off at Docklands.
* You remember when it was fucking scary to go anywhere near Spencer Street Station. In fact you refused to go there alone and you still don't *quite* trust it not to be dodgy.
* You miss having a zillion public holidays like the rest of Oz.
* I say "Jeff Kennett yellow penis on the Tulla" and you probably know what I'm talking about.

Labels: fairness, melbourne musings, school, stressed teachers, teacher dramas

posted by M at 7:20 pm 15 comments

As you may know, next year I'm going back to the classroom and today was my first real taste of how life is going to be post art teaching. I've decided that life is going to be hard, real hard. I feel like I've been run over with a steam roller driven by a bunch of 5 year olds no less.

You see the kindergarten children come to school in the last few weeks of this year to meet the teachers and have a go at being at school just like the big kids - before 'real school' next year. So this afternoon found me nervously facing a bunch of the littlest children and trying to sing a song with them while their parents scrutinized my every move. Next week I've decided that no parents will be allowed in the room. I don't quite know how I am going to achieve that but it must be done somehow.

Those particular parents that just HAD to stay, all insisted that their child had adjustment issues. You know what I say? Your child has adjustment issues because you won't bloody leave them alone. They're 5 - if you let them be themselves for a second they'll adjust. Yeah it will be tears for a bit but for christssake kids cry, get over it (though I have to make a point and say that none of these kids were crying at all). Yes, sure there are children with "special needs" - this is different but there are some parents who just wouldn't go, they just stood in the corner glaring at their child, or worse yet - would prompt them for everything. They'd prompt them about writing. They'd prompt them about how to build with the blocks. They'd prompt them on how to sit. When I say "hey Thingo, here's a piece of paper can you write down all the words you know for me?" you telling your child what to write defeats the whole purpose of me observing their behaviour. If they don't know what words are then I want to know that they don't know what words are. There is no right or wrong here it's just establishing where the children are so that we can group them to their best needs next year. It's not going to count for their university entrance rank! Furthermore I'd like to see how your child interacts with other children. You are the centre of their lives, if you're in the room then they will not want to interact with others, they will just go straight to you. UGH.

Anyway, I drew a diagram to help you understand how the afternoon went. If it looks messy on paper, think about how my brain feels right about now (and multiply by three).

Labels: school, stressed teachers, teaching, tired

posted by M at 6:35 pm 19 comments